The Process of Change

The process of change requires both identifying the changes you wish to make, and development of a systematic plan for bringing about that change. Below you will find details on both of these steps.

Identifying Necessary Changes

Before you can change, you of course first need to know exactly what to change. Our systematic approach to the identification of these necessary changes uses the following four-step process.

Generate your ideal self.
Generate your self-image.
Compare the two to identify the gaps.
Prioritize the gaps based on likely costs and benefits and the likelihood of success.

For more on these steps, see the list to the right.

1. Ideal-Self

Your ideal self is a list of qualities you would like to have in the future. These qualities should be:

specific and concrete, such as what you know or can do, what you believe, or how you behave, and
oriented around a specific goal, such as career achievements or social goals.

Creating an ideal self may take some research, and feedback from others is usually helpful.

2. Self-Image

Generating a self-image involves going through the list of qualities identified for your ideal self and identifying which you possess and which you do not possess. And remember,

be honest and realistic, and
seek input from others.

3. Gaps

Analyzing the gaps between your ideal self and your self-image isn't quite as simple as it seems. In many cases it won't be as simple as saying "I need it and I don't have it." More often you will be saying, :I have some of it, but is it enough?" As before:

be honest and realistic, and
seek input from others.

4. Priorities

It's not wise to try to change too many things at once. Setting priorities is important. In deciding priorities, consider the following:

the cost of the change in terms of money and resources, time, and commitment,
the likely benefits of the change, and
the likelihood of success.

Proper planning and execution are important, but they don't perform magic. Most of us are not going to be astronauts or the lead singer of a rock band. As always,

be honest and realistic, and
seek input from others.

Planning

To have the best chance of success in your efforts to change, you need a plan that is concrete and detailed. It should include:

small, manageable steps,
monitoring of progress,
rewards for success, and
a support network.

1. Small Steps

Make large and intimidating changes manageable by:

setting concrete, achievable milestones, and
breaking down larger steps into smaller steps.

When setting milestones, ask yourself two questions.

Will I be able to tell when I have achieved this?
How will I know when I have achieved this?

If a step still seems intimidating, it probably needs to be broken down further.

2. Monitor Progress

Below are some techniques for monitoring progress.

Recording in a journal each day your thoughts, actions, feelings, and challenges.
In a notebook record each day any instances of new thoughts, feelings, or actions that indicate progress.
Seek feedback from others.

3. Reward Success

When rewarding yourself, consider both intrinsic rewards, such as pride in your accomplishment, and extrinsic rewards, such as treats or other prizes.

Acknowledge your hard work with feelings of pride and satisfaction.
Set up small rewards for milestones, such as taking a longer break or getting a nice coffee after a productive week.
Work toward a bigger, more significant reward for achieving a major goal, like a weekend getaway or a new electronic gadget.
Reward yourself with time for relaxation, like taking a nap, or going for a walk.
Choose rewards that support your goal; for example, if you're trying to exercise more, buy new workout clothes instead of food.
Make it a shared experience: If appropriate, share your reward with someone, like going to a play or concert with a friend.

4. Build Support

Even the best of plans can benefit from a little help from your friends. Here's a few considerations for maximizing the value of your support network.

Identify the steps in your plan where you are most likely to need help, then identify family members, friends, or coworkers most likely to be helpful -- they have the right skills or are just good at nagging you to get you to do what you need to do.
Cover those gaps by expanding your network to include communities or organizations that overlap your needs, either in person or online.
Seek out mentors from among those you identify as having achieved the goals you are attemtping to achieve.

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